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The absolute TRAUMA of having to explain JavaScript Promises to another human being! This poor developer would literally rather face a firing squad than attempt to articulate the hellscape of asynchronous programming. "Don't shoot! I am JS Developer" he pleads, but when asked to explain Promises? "SHOOT." The desperation! The drama! The absolute surrender to sweet, sweet death rather than explaining why your callback hell needed to be replaced with .then() chains that somehow became even MORE confusing! At least with death you only suffer once - explaining Promises is eternal suffering!

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The mythical "Bython" – where Python's readability meets curly braces! It's the unicorn language that solves the eternal tabs vs. spaces war by letting you write Python with C-style syntax. The code snippet shows Python's function definition and loops but with those sweet, sweet curly braces instead of whitespace indentation. Seasoned Python devs secretly dream about this. No more broken code because someone mixed tabs and spaces. No more staring at your screen trying to figure out if that's 4 spaces or 3. Just good old trusty braces telling you exactly where blocks begin and end! Ironically, the function still prints "Bython is awesome!" – which is technically true, except Bython doesn't actually exist (yet). It's the programming language equivalent of finding a unicorn that poops rainbows and compiles without errors on the first try.

When you discover that fixing a tiny bug means jumping through an obstacle course of spaghetti code, dependency hell, and technical debt... suddenly a complete rewrite seems like the only rational option! It's like trying to remove one Jenga piece but realizing the entire tower is held together by hopes, prayers, and that one intern's commented-out code from 2017. The "Parkour!" reference perfectly captures that mental gymnastics of justifying why touching this cursed codebase any further would be professional malpractice.

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That moment when your stomach drops through the floor because you just executed DELETE * FROM users; and suddenly realize you're connected to production instead of your local environment. The five stages of database grief begin: denial, anger, bargaining with the SQL gods, depression, and finally acceptance that your resume needs updating. This is the exact face you make when contemplating how many years of your career just evaporated in a single keystroke. Career-ending query speedrun: WORLD RECORD!