How Can You Make It Worse?

People with pets get a little paw resting on them. People in relationships get their partner cuddling close. But Computer Science Engineers? They've got the laptop perched on the chest, dual monitors flanking the bed, phone within arm's reach, and charging cables snaking everywhere like some kind of silicon-based life support system.

The escalation from "cute pet" to "romantic partner" to "full battlestation setup in bed" is basically the developer's version of relationship status. Why spoon when you can debug? Why cuddle when you can compile? The bed isn't for sleeping anymore—it's a horizontal workspace with slightly better lumbar support than your office chair.

Bonus points if that laptop is running a build that's taking forever, so you can't even close it without losing progress. The phone is probably Stack Overflow on one tab and production alerts on the other. Sleep is just a long-running background process that occasionally gets interrupted by critical bugs.