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How a career in technical communication ruined me as a letter writer BEFORE: Unnecessary verbage Unnecessary–omit. Superfluous detail Redundant Avoid Dear Aunt Bee, v Sentence too long parentheticals I wanted to thank you so much for the beautiful new angora sweater you sent me for my birtiday I cant believe you remembered that blue is my absolute favorite dolor (especially that gorgeous shade of robin’s egg blue, which reminds me of the summers I spent with you in the country, all those years ago)! I’ll think of you whenever I wear it. I really appreciate the time and effort you took to pick this out, wrap it so micely, and send it to me With lots of love. vour niece. Avoid future tense; avoid Suzanne contractions Subiective Last sentence does not add anything to the meaning. Unnecessary. She knows who you are AFTER: Dear Aunt Bee, Thank you for the sweater. It is: Warm Soft ORmA I think of you when I wear the sweater. I appreciate your kindness. Sincerely, Suzane