Glory To The Penguin

Content Linux Steven J. Vaughan-Nichols sjvn 19h Oh no! Linux's code has been leaked!! Whatever will we do!!? Linus Torvalds confirms Lapsus breach after hackers publish Linux kernel source code Carly Page carlypage 12:33 PM GMT-3 March 23, 2022 Comment a) Image Credits: Jaap Arriens NurPhoto Getty Images Linus Torvalds has confirmed that the source code was cloned by the Lapsus hacking group. In a blog post on Tuesday - published hours after Lapsus posted a torrent file containing partial source code from Linux kernel - the geek man revealed that his branch was cloned by the hacking group, granting the attackers unlimited power to

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The eternal battle between Microsoft's desperate pleas and Linux users' defiant independence is perfectly captured here. Microsoft is literally begging you not to download Chrome while simultaneously pushing Edge down your throat like an overeager parent with vegetables. Meanwhile, Linux users are treating Microsoft like an annoying insect - cracking their command-line whips and shooing away anything that doesn't respect their freedom to choose. The imagery of commanding Git with a bullwhip is just *chef's kiss* - because nothing says "I'm in control of my computing destiny" like manually compiling your kernel while laughing maniacally.

Console gamers weeping as pacman-Syu forces them into Linux territory. For the uninitiated, "pacman -Syu" is the Arch Linux command to update your entire system—the digital equivalent of your friend who won't shut up about CrossFit, veganism, and their standing desk. Arch users are the tech world's evangelists who somehow work "I use Arch btw" into every conversation, even when discussing breakfast cereal. Now imagine forcing PlayStation and Xbox devotees to abandon their comfortable button-mashing for terminal commands and dependency hell. Pure evil genius.

Someone actually filed a GitHub issue because their cough crashed their program. Let that sink in. Their biological function literally corrupted memory somewhere and brought down code. This is what happens when you code so close to the metal that even your bodily functions can trigger buffer overflows. The real question is - did they try turning their throat off and on again before submitting the ticket?

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