Teach Them Young Or Child Abuse?

OH. MY. GOD. This poor father is inflicting Java 2 on INFANTS! The absolute HORROR! 😱 That baby on the left is clearly having an existential crisis while the toddler on the right is still blissfully unaware her childhood joy is being sacrificed at the altar of semicolons and boilerplate code! This is basically the programming equivalent of showing toddlers tax forms as bedtime stories! Next thing you know, these poor children will be dreaming of garbage collection and static typing before they can even spell their own names! Somebody call child services - this is a case of premature object orientation if I've ever seen one!