I Won But At What Cost

That moment when even dinner conversations turn into technical debates. Normal people ask for salt, but programmers immediately need to know the implementation details. Pass-by-value makes a copy (enjoy your own salt shaker), while pass-by-reference just hands you the original (here, use mine). Ten years into coding and I still overthink simple interactions like this. The real question is whether the salt has immutable properties...

Content (1... I HAVE TO DO IT. I HAVE TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FRIENDS. YOU KNOW, IF YOU GO IN THERE, THERE'S NO COMING BACK ava THE FOOL...

Content We are going to freeze to death if we don't do something We only have one option left System32Comics RaphComic Android Run Studio

Content Java telling me my var isn't used anywhere Me not done typing my code yet

Content PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT HAS ALMOST NO STANDARD LIBRARY SOLUTION: THOUSANDS OF COMMUNITY -SUPPORTED LIBRARIES OF WILDLY VARYING QUALITY PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT HAS NO PACKAGING OR A LINKER TO TIE THESE PACKAGES TOGETHER PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT WON'T RUN OUTSIDE THE BROWSER SOLUTION: V8 PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT IS SINGLE -THREAD BY DESIGN SOLUTION: ASYNCHRONOUS PROGRAMMING, NODE. JS PROBLEM: CALLBACK HELL PROBLEM: PROTOTYPAL INHERITANCE IS PANTS -ON- HEAD STUPID THAT'S RIGHT, I SAID IT. PROBLEM: WEB RESOURCES NEED TO BE MINIFIED AND ZIPPED FOR PERFORMANCE PROBLEM: THE DOM IS TOO SLOW FOR VIDEO GAMES SOLUTION: CANVAS PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT IS TOO SLOW FOR VIDEO GAMES SOLUTION: USE AN ASSEMBLY- LIKE SUBSET OF JAVASCRIPT CALLED ASM.JS PROBLEM: ASM.JS IS BASICALLY UNWRITABLE 4 HUMANS. SOLUTION: COMPILE A BETTER LANGUAGE TO JAVASCRIPT (C, EMASCRIPT 2016, COFFEESCRIPT, JSX) SOLUTION: HUNDREDS OF COMMUNITY SUPPORTED BUILD TOOLS OF WILDLY VARYING QUALITY PROBLEM: GRUNT. SOLUTION: GULP PROBLEM: GULP PROBLEM: MACHINE GENERATED OUTPUT IS MORE DIFFICULT TO DEBUG PROBLEM: ASYNC IS STILL A NIGHTMARE, HUH? PROBLEM: BALLOONING PROJECT SIZE AND COMPLEXITY PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT STILL DOESN'T DO EVERYTHING PROBLEM: OUTPUT RUNS VERY SLOWLY ON MOBILE DEVICES SOLUTION: ELECTRON, PHONEGAP, FIREFOXOS HOW IS DIGGING GOING TO GET US OUT OF THIS HOLE? WHERE I AM FROM, THE POINT OF DIGGING IS NOT FREEDOM FROM DIGGING

Ah, Jython. The programming language equivalent of putting pineapple on pizza and then setting the pizza on fire. One developer screams "It's Java!" while another insists "It's Python!" Then the horrifying truth emerges—it's both . The final panel reveals the unholy Java+Python hybrid logo, prompting the only reasonable response: complete disgust. Jython combines Java's verbosity with Python's indentation quirks—truly the software equivalent of wearing socks with sandals while also stepping in a puddle.