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The classic trolley problem, but make it git. You've got one innocent developer on the upper track and a whole team on the lower track. What's a responsible engineer to do? Run git rebase master of course!
Plot twist: rebasing doesn't actually save anyone. It just rewrites history so that lone developer who was safe on the upper track now gets yeeted to the lower track with everyone else. The team went from "we're all gonna die together" to "we're STILL all gonna die together, but now with a cleaner commit history."
The best part? That "Successfully rebased and updated ref" message is basically git's way of saying "I did what you asked, don't blame me for the consequences." Sure, your branch looks linear and beautiful now, but at what cost? At what cost?!
Pro tip: This is why some teams have a strict "no rebase on shared branches" policy. Because one person's quest for a pristine git log can turn into everyone's merge conflict nightmare faster than you can say git reflog.
