Karma Farming On Github

Terry, the mythical unicorn of development. Spends two decades crafting his own OS (because apparently existing ones weren't painful enough), yet somehow manages to write commit messages that don't read like encrypted ransom notes. Meanwhile, the rest of us are over here with our "fixed stuff" and "updated things" commits, wondering if we should just give up and become goat farmers.

The ABSOLUTE PEAK of solo developer dignity! 💅 Creating a pull request on your own repository and then dramatically switching hats to approve it yourself is the coding equivalent of giving yourself a medal! It's that special moment when you pretend there's an actual code review happening, but it's just you having a conversation with yourself like some kind of Git schizophrenia. "Hmm, this code looks FABULOUS, darling! Who wrote it? Oh wait—IT WAS ME!" The ceremonial self-merge: simultaneously the most pathetic and most empowering ritual in solo development history!

The absolute chad move of rewriting half the codebase and calling it "minor changes" before disappearing into the void. Nothing says "I'm the main character" like dropping a 4000-line bomb on your colleagues and then strutting away while they try to figure out what the hell just happened. The git commit history will remember your name long after you've gone home to enjoy your weekend.

SWEETIE, GitHub Copilot promised you'd code 55% faster, but FAILED to mention you'd be creating bugs at HIGHWAY SPEEDS! 💀 The coding police have arrived, and honey, your bug count is so high it's breaking traffic laws! Sure, you're typing like a caffeinated cheetah, but your code quality is giving "crash test dummy" vibes. That's not productivity—that's a CRIME SCENE waiting for a git commit!

The modern developer's digital mirror match! GitHub Copilot is shaking hands with itself in the ultimate AI narcissism loop. When your code assistant both writes and reviews your code, it's basically just patting itself on the back. "Great job me, I approve of what I wrote!" This is peak programming efficiency—why waste time having humans review code when the robot can just high-five itself? The circle of AI life is complete. Next up: GitHub Copilot creating pull requests for problems it invented while reviewing its own code.

The evolution of code sharing has reached its final form! First, we have GitHub - the standard way professionals share code. Then Google Drive - when you're desperate and don't know version control exists. Next level: taking a PICTURE of your code - the debugging equivalent of sending "pls fix" to your senior dev at 4:59pm on Friday. But the galaxy brain move? Reading your code aloud and publishing it as an audiobook on Amazon. Imagine listening to someone monotonously reciting "for i equals zero semicolon i less than array dot length semicolon i plus plus open curly brace" during your morning commute. That's not just programming - that's psychological warfare against humanity itself.