Be Careful What You Wish For: Game Engine Edition

When your resume isn't getting any callbacks so you code it as a class implementation. This guy's living in 2077 while the rest of us are still using Word templates. The best part? He's somehow managed to code his future experience at a job starting in September 2024. Nothing says "hire me" like a time paradox and some premature optimization of your career path. That 1.7K thumbs up isn't just social validation—it's a compile-time assertion that this approach works. Meanwhile, recruiters are still trying to figure out if they should run this resume or read it.

Spent $3000 on a liquid-cooled gaming rig with RGB everything just to play a game that looks like it was made in Microsoft Paint. Meanwhile, the kid with a potato laptop is desperately trying to run Cyberpunk at 12 FPS. The true tragedy of modern gaming isn't bad game design—it's resource allocation. That RTX 4090 is sitting there calculating the perfect shadow on a Roblox brick while somewhere an integrated GPU is literally catching fire.

Borderlands devs absolutely demolishing gamers with month-old rigs is peak tech hierarchy. The gaming industry's entire business model relies on making your $2000 setup obsolete faster than milk expires. You'll be running that shiny new game at 12 FPS while the recommended specs casually suggest "just a quantum computer with direct neural interface." Meanwhile, game optimization remains an ancient forgotten art, like proper documentation or reasonable deadlines.

The eternal cycle of game development hell, illustrated through Omni-Man's bloody lecture. That moment when management keeps throwing money at broken, unfinished ports instead of giving devs proper time to finish the product. Just another day in the industry where the "ship now, patch later" mentality reigns supreme. Meanwhile, QA testers sit in the corner, reports ignored, muttering "I literally warned you about this exact bug three months ago."

The AUDACITY of the universe to both reward and humble you simultaneously! 💀 Left side: that GLORIOUS moment when your janky game actually gets accepted at GDQ (Games Done Quick, the prestigious speedrunning event). Right side: the soul-crushing realization that they've categorized your coding masterpiece under "AWFUL GAMES." Look at that face—it's the exact expression you make when your spaghetti code somehow passes all the tests but the senior dev still calls it "an abomination against computer science." The bar was on the FLOOR and we still managed to trip over it!

Oh. My. GOD! The AUDACITY of benchmark purists! 💅 You know you're dealing with the ELITE of computing when someone runs benchmarks without frame generation or upscaling. These people strut around with their raw performance metrics like they're carrying the holy grail of computing! While the rest of us PEASANTS are just trying to squeeze decent framerates with our pathetic GPUs, these benchmark purists are over here demanding "REAL PERFORMANCE NUMBERS" and "GENUINE RENDERING" like they're some kind of digital aristocracy! I can't even! The next time someone brags about their "native resolution benchmarks," I'm just going to dramatically faint right onto my DLSS-upscaled desktop!