Every Freaking Time

Content How to fix any computer The Oatmeal Windows Step I. Reboot Apple Step I. Take it to an Apple store. v Did that fix it, No? Proceed to step a Did that fix it; No? Proceed to step a Step a. Format hard drive Reinstall Windows Lose all your files. Quietly weep. Step a. Buy a new Mac. Overdraw your account. Quietly weep. Linux Step I. Learn to code in C. Recompile the kernel. Build your own microprocessor out of spare silicon you had lying around. Recompile the kernel again. Switch distros Recompile the kernel again but this time using a CPU powered by refracted light from Saturn. Grow a giont beard. Blame Sun Microsusters. Turn your bedroom into a server closet and spend ten years falling asleep to the sound of whirring fans. Switch distros again. Abandon all hugene. Write a regular expression that would make other precrammers cry blood. Learn to code in Java Recompile the kernel again Cut thic time while wearing your lucky socks) Did that fix its Nor Proceed to step an Step a. Revert back to using Windows or a Mac. Quietlu weep.

Content When you write your first program and get no errors I see no God up here Other than ME made with mematic

The innocent question that breaks every developer's heart. "Is there documentation?" We all know the answer before it's even given. The silent embrace that follows is the universal symbol for "you're on your own, kid - just read the source code like the rest of us." That comforting hug isn't saying "it'll be okay" - it's saying "welcome to the wonderful world of guessing what the original programmer was thinking at 3AM after their sixth coffee."

The special kind of hell reserved for C/C++ developers. You spend weeks meticulously crafting code that works flawlessly on your machine, only for it to burst into flames in production because some environment-specific preprocessor directive decided today was a good day to ruin your life. The best part? Your debug build works perfectly, but as soon as you ship to production—surprise! That #ifdef RELEASE section you forgot about just activated like a sleeper agent. And what do we do? Smile through the pain and pretend everything's not on fire. Classic.

Content Me Copilot We finish each other's Sandwiches imaflip.com DAMMIT COPILOT

Content 1 2 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 Coding Best Practices: One of the key concepts of quaility code is orthogonality Me: Is it orthogonal enough? console. log (... ( (-- (-), (- (1??)? (-):)()L 1) . - DEBUG CONSOLE usrlocalbinnode .orthogonal.js 2 3 5 7 11 13 17 19 23 29 31 37 41 43 47 53 59 61 67 71 73 79 83 89 97