When Your Terrible Database Hack Works First Try

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Content FuckltJS Javascript Error Steamroller FuckitJS uses state-of-the-art technology to make sure your javascript code runs whether your compiler likes it or not. Technology Through a process known as Eval-Rinse-Reload-And-Repeat, FuckltJS repeatedly compiles your code, detecting errors and slicing those lines out of the script. To survive such a violent process, FuckltJS reloads itself after each iteration, allowing the onerror handler to catch every single error in your terribly written code. Installation 1. Include Query, because everything requires Query 2. Include "fuckit.is" 3. The End

Ah, the classic primary key violation that no one warned the poor user about. Some developer thought storing age as a unique identifier was a brilliant idea, and now we've got 17-year-olds fighting in the Thunderdome for database supremacy. Next time try using UUID instead of, you know, THE MOST COMMON AGE AMONG TEENAGE USERS. This is what happens when you let the intern design your database schema after a Red Bull all-nighter.

Content A Time-Series Analysis of my Girlfriends Mood Swings Dr. Chad Broman' 'Department of Applied Psychological Machine Leaming, Cranberry-Lemon University, Pittsburgh, PA. USA Abstract Despite recent advances in active listening, date night, and extended pillow talk; it is becoming increasingly more difficult to forecast Tiffany's mood. With more and more Playstation 5 exclusive games, it is becoming increasingly important to determine Tiffany's mood before purchasing a new game and playing online Co-op with the boys every evening for a week straight. This paper aims to determine the optimal forecast model of my girlfriend's drastically growing mood swings by comparing simple moving averages, to sextuple exponential smoothing and even an overly complicated Machine Learning model. Despite initial analysis showing non-stationarity and highly seasonal mood swings. the more simple models provided less riskier forecast predictions when planning a three day bender after Matt got divorced. Keywords: Relationships, Time Series Analysis, Forecast Modeling. Playstation 5 Exclusives 1. Introduction find her endlessly scrolling through reddit for memes. facebook or instagram for jealousy, and twitter to keep up on Traditional methods of determining whether Tiffany is in a all the public officials and celebrities she hates the most. good mood has produced wildly subjective results causing dangerous outcomes such as her taking three hours to 1.2 Purpose respond to a text, flaking on nettlix and chill plans or even most disastrously having to return a speed boat even though Ever since her best friends started having kids and she got it was a great deal and an even better investment. promoted to a stressful corporate position she was not trained Just asking her if she's okay is not enough anymore. The for. it has become exponentially difficult to olan around only reliable method is to develop. test. verify. and Tiffany's emotional highs and lows. This is becoming not implement an extensive forecasting model by analyzing only problematic but is a problem that needs to be solved historical Tiffany mood swing data. immediately. To dispel any misconceptions, it's not about

Content rgithub Posted by u) 15 minutes ago Vote I am new to GitHub and I have lots to say I DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE FUCKING CODE! i just want to download this stupid fucking application and use it https:github.comsherlock-projectsherlockinstallation WHY IS THERE CODE??? MAKE A FUCKING EXE FILE AND GIVE IT TO ME. these dumbfucks think that everyone is a developer and understands code. well i am not and i don't understand it. I only know to download and install applications. SO WHY THE FUCK IS THERE CODE? make an EXE file and give it to me. STUPID FUCKING SMELLY NERDS 2. Comments Share Save A

Content After thousands of applications, I just accepted an offer from a McFAANG company! Shitpost Don't want to specify which one, but I'm super excited to finally be working at a top tier McFAANG company! I will be in a Forward Deployed Food Engineering Specialist role! Some of my job responsibilities include: Building ETL pipelines to extract frozen patties from the FREEZER database and transforming them into ready made burgers Deriving insights and analysis on client orders from the cash register Managing real-time NoSQL (No Salt Queue Layer) deployments for french fry processing Maintaining high-throughput IO operations at drive-through queuing interface while ensuring sub-60-second response times Implementing mission-critical data cleaning protocols using proprietary mop-based algorithms Debugging ice cream machines I'm extremely excited to receive a base TC of over 280k (per decade) for my first job out of college! If anyone wants some tips or tricks, feel free to ask