Only Seventythree More Years

OH. MY. GOD. The AUDACITY of someone to suggest that C++ would choose this... this... CREATURE as its mascot! 💅 For your information, sweetie, C++ is represented by a PROPER logo that's all clean and mathematical with pluses, not some mangy rodent with suspicious patches! The fact that someone had to CLARIFY this is sending me into orbit! Poor Keith is just living his best diseased rat life while being DRAGGED into programming language politics he never asked for! The real tragedy here is that Keith probably writes better memory management code than half the C++ developers out there. 🙄

The classic developer trap: "I'll just use threads to solve this!" Fast forward 10 minutes and you're debugging race conditions, deadlocks, and wondering why your CPU is on fire. It's like trying to fix a leaky pipe with a flamethrower—technically you've solved the original problem, but now your house is burning down. Multithreading: turning one straightforward problem into an exciting collection of non-deterministic nightmares since the dawn of computing.

The mental strain of understanding pointers in C++ is basically the equivalent of doing CrossFit for your brain. Your forehead wrinkles become perfectly defined abs from all the intense furrowing while trying to figure out whether *ptr is the value, &ptr is the address, or if you've just summoned a memory demon that's about to crash your entire system. And references? Just pointers wearing a trench coat pretending to be civilized. The only difference is that one lets you shoot yourself in the foot while the other politely holds the gun for you.

Ah yes, the classic "let me solve this simple problem with the most unnecessarily complex solution possible" approach. Two mutually recursive functions to check if a number is even or odd? This has ChatGPT's fingerprints all over it. Meanwhile, every developer with more than 3 brain cells is screaming: return (n % 2 == 0); and calling it a day. This is what happens when you ask AI to "make it elegant" or "optimize this function." You get code that looks impressive in a technical interview but would get you publicly shamed in a code review.

The brutal efficiency truth no programmer wants to face: we're using an entire byte (8 precious bits) just to store a single boolean value that's either true or false. That's like buying a mansion to store a single sock. The sheer wastefulness of it all is enough to make any memory-conscious developer weep uncontrollably. And yet we continue this digital travesty every day, pretending it's fine while 87.5% of our boolean storage space sits there, completely unused, mocking our so-called "optimization skills."

The code shows a comment that says "Only gay people use auto" followed by a classic C++ for loop. The irony? The programmer is using cout and other C++ features while shunning the auto keyword that automatically deduces variable types. It's like saying "I only drink artisanal water" while chugging Mountain Dew. The real programmer flex isn't avoiding modern language features—it's writing code that doesn't make your colleagues contemplate career changes.