When The Father Is A Programmer

Content Me making the commit and pushing it before my colleagues, so I don't have to deal with merge errors H

Content STOP USING RISC CPU'S ARE SUPPOSED TO DO MORE, MORE EFFICIENTLY BILLIONS in development yet NO REAL-WORLD USE for replacing INSTRUCTIONS with MORE REGISTERS Wanted to put a value somewhere on the processor anyway for a laugh? We had a tool for that: It was called "EDX" OR "MEMORY" "Yes, please give me ZERO tools for cryptography. Please replace HARDWARE OPTIMIZATION with my own poorly written SOFTWARE" - Statements dreamed up by the utterly Deranged LOOK at what ElectricalComputer Engineers have been demanding your Respect for all this time, with all the HDL's and chip fabs we built for them (THIS IS REAL RISC ARCHITECTURE, DONE BY REAL ENGINEERS) ARM7TDMI Core Diagram IBM PowerPC 601 IBM 1992 A raw in uh orocessors given the name "hracles was announceo n may 2021 wo sanchoreo abolications can exchange dale without the systems Pacman edit i PPC601FD-080-2 .19425030KS ????? ??????? ??????????????? "Hello I would like to add two numbers together, let me just LDR LDR LDR ADD ADD STR" THEY HAVE PLAYED US FOR ABSOLUTE FOOLS ProarammerHumo

Content LADIES AND GENTLEMEN IT IS WITH GREAT PLEASURE THAT I INFORM YOU I HAVE FINALLY CONTRIBUTED SOME MEANINGFUL CODE TO THE COMPANY I HAVE BEEN WORKING FOR THE LAST 6 MONTHS

Content A SERVICE THAT WILL SCALE INFINITELY CLOUD SERVICE PROVIDER CLUELESS MANAGEMENT DEVTEAM BUTWILLALSO RANKRUPT THE COMPANY

Content MESSAGES Babe W 15,000 out of our checking account?!? MESSAGES Babe Is it what I think it is? 9 90 aws now now

Regular coding mistakes: "Oops, I forgot a semicolon." Enterprise coding mistakes: "So I accidentally stored everyone's unencrypted photos with location data in a public Firebase bucket and now there's a map of all users circulating online." This is why we can't have nice things in tech. Some junior dev probably skipped the security training to finish that "urgent feature" and now lawyers are measuring their future yachts. The difference between "ship fast" and "shipwreck" is just a few lines of code and a complete disregard for basic security practices.