It's All Us-East-1? Always Has Been

Content Gedda gedda AWS terms of service. (42.10) " will not apply in the event of the occurrence of a widespread viral infection transmitted via bites or contact with bodily fluids that causes human corpses to reanimate and seek to consume living human flesh, blood, brain or nerve tissue...

Family gathering downstairs? Nah. Turkey dinner? Pass. Opening presents? Maybe later. But committing your AWS credentials and database passwords to a public repo in a blurry .env file while sitting alone with your laptop? Now that's the holiday spirit. Nothing says "Merry Christmas" quite like exposing your entire infrastructure to the internet. The tree is decorated, the lights are twinkling, and your BETTER_AUTH_SECRET is about to become everyone's secret. At least the photo is blurry enough that we can only read like 80% of those credentials. Security through jpeg compression—a strategy as old as time. Pro tip: Next year, maybe add .env to your .gitignore before you add it to your Christmas card.

Content CATALIN PIT O catalinmpit If your job spec looks like this: HTML, CSS JavaScript, Python NodeJS, GraphQL React AWS Docker Jenkins, Drone Bash scripting Puppet Terraform Kubernetes MySQL, DynamoDB, MongoDB, Aurora You're looking for an entire IT department, not for a developer!

Content Dear recruiters, if you are looking for: - Java, Python, PHP - React, Angular - PostgreSQL, Redis, MongoDB - AWS, S3, EC2, ECS, EKS - Linux system administration - Git and CI with TDD - Docker, Kubernetes That's not a Full Stack Developer. That's an entire IT department. Your truly

Content As soon as my employer gives me access to the AWS test account LIVE BREAKING NEWS OP'S COMPANY WENT BANKRUPT 11:45 made with mematic OVER NIGHT A HEALTHY IT COMPANY WENT BANKRUPT DUE TO AWS BILLS

So that's what's holding up the internet - a precarious tower of technology balanced on Linus Torvalds' shoulders with a random shark at the DNS level. Turns out those underwater cables aren't the most concerning part of our infrastructure. The real MVP is that shark guarding the DNS servers while C developers write dynamic arrays, Rust devs do their thing, and some web dev quietly sabotages himself in the corner. Meanwhile, unpaid open source developers and "whatever Microsoft is doing" somehow keep this Jenga tower from collapsing. Sleep well tonight knowing your entire digital existence depends on this absurd tech stack and one very dedicated fish.