The Only Language I Speak Is AAAAAAAA

Ah, the glorious isEven.js function with a chain of if-else statements that would make any senior dev weep into their coffee. Nothing says "I have a CS degree" like checking each number individually instead of using num % 2 === 0 . But honestly, that lakeside view is the real flex here. You're not coding like this because you don't have a six-figure remote job that lets you write terrible algorithms while overlooking a serene winter landscape. The code may be horrific, but that work-life balance is god-tier.

Ah, the irony of modern tech! Here's a vintage book teaching "Artificial Intelligence in BASIC" from what looks like the 80s, sitting right next to "EXPERT SYSTEMS" on the bookshelf. Fast forward to 2023, and we're all losing our minds over ChatGPT and friends—billion-dollar AI systems built on Python, a language that would make your CPU cry if you asked it to calculate 2+2 in less than half a second. The cosmic joke is that we've gone from programming AI in languages designed to be "Beginner's All-purpose" to building world-changing models with a language where indentation errors can crash your entire system. Somewhere, this book's author is either laughing hysterically or weeping uncontrollably.

ChatGPT confidently declaring there are 9 triangles when most humans can only spot 4 is the perfect metaphor for AI development. It's either seeing mathematical patterns beyond our comprehension or just making stuff up with unwavering confidence. The real AGI achievement isn't counting triangles—it's the audacity to be wrong with such conviction that you start questioning your own sanity. Next up: AI explaining why your code works when it absolutely shouldn't.

The ultimate power move in tech interviews isn't knowing how to reverse a binary tree—it's having the audacity to ask the interviewer to do it instead. That silent angry stare in the last panel is worth a thousand lines of code. Next time someone asks you to solve FizzBuzz on a whiteboard, just respond with "I don't know, can YOU?" and watch their entire interview script crash and burn. Checkmate, tech industry.

Oh sweet heavens, the AUDACITY of C language pointer syntax! First panel: array[3] - absolutely logical, accessing the 4th element. Second panel: *(array + 3) - STILL FINE because arrays are basically just fancy pointers wearing a trench coat. But then... THEN... 3[array] ?! THE UNHOLY ABOMINATION THAT ACTUALLY WORKS?! Because in C's twisted reality, a[b] is literally just syntactic sugar for *(a+b) , and addition is commutative so *(3+array) is valid. The character's face in the last panel is my soul leaving my body the first time I discovered this cursed knowledge.

When your colleague gets to use the fancy for loop with a clear exit condition, but you're stuck with the while loop that never seems to end - just like this press conference. The guy on the left is basically all of us waiting for that condition to finally evaluate to false so we can go home. Meanwhile, management keeps adding microphones like they're adding requirements to the sprint.