Web Developers In The Near Future

Content THE BUGT"FIED" LAST WEEK SHOWING UP THE SEGOND I FEEL JOY AGAIN

Normal people sleep peacefully while programmers lie awake, staring into the void, haunted by that one bug they can't fix, the looming tech layoffs, existential AI career threats, and the crushing obligation to learn yet another JavaScript framework that'll be obsolete before they finish the tutorial. Sleep is just a luxury reserved for those who don't know what a dependency tree is.

The perfect juxtaposition of human relationships and code commitments. While people are discussing wedding day abandonment drama above, some dev is casually flexing about building a GitHub issue processor with pocket change worth of API calls below. This is the digital equivalent of someone announcing their pregnancy at someone else's funeral. Algorithmic tone-deafness at its finest. That ad placement is so bad it's almost impressive—like when your junior dev pushes directly to production on Friday at 4:59pm.

Turns out both chefs and AI "developers" are just throwing ingredients together and hoping something edible comes out. The difference? Chefs actually know what basil is. Ten years of writing clean, maintainable code just to be replaced by someone who knows how to type "make me a full-stack app with blockchain integration" into a text box. At least the spaghetti I'm eating tastes better than the spaghetti code these AI tools are churning out.

The eternal machine learning love triangle! Your relationship with TensorFlow was going just fine until PyTorch walked by with those sleek dynamic computation graphs and intuitive Python interface. Now you're doing that awkward neck-twist of betrayal while TensorFlow catches you eyeing PyTorch's hot new features. The static graph never felt so... static. Let's be honest, we've all mentally cheated on our ML frameworks. It's not you, TensorFlow, it's your verbose API and that whole session management thing.

Ah, the modern developer's version of "my code is compiling." Remember when we had to wait for actual compile times? Now we just blame the AI for our extended coffee breaks. The beauty is that nobody can verify if ChatGPT is actually still working or if you've been scrolling Reddit for the last 45 minutes. And the best part? Management can't argue because they're doing the exact same thing. It's the perfect crime - you're technically "waiting for a tool" while secretly planning your weekend. And if anyone questions the time it takes, just mutter something about "token limits" and "complex prompting strategies."