AGI Has Been Achieved Hypothetically

The tech industry's obsession with AI in a nutshell. Companies rebrand basic algorithms as "AI" while VCs throw money at anything with those two magical letters. Meanwhile, developers watching from the sidelines know it's just another overhyped technology that'll eventually join blockchain and NFTs in the graveyard of "revolutionary paradigm shifts." The corporate world can't tell the difference because they're too busy adding "AI-powered" to their pitch decks to secure that sweet, sweet funding.

Nothing says "I'm helping" like an AI that can't even match parentheses properly. Those unbalanced brackets and braces in Google's Gemini ad are the coding equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. Sure, let the AI write your code—if you enjoy debugging cryptic syntax errors at 2AM while questioning your career choices. "Streamline your workflow" they say... more like "streamline your path to Stack Overflow." The irony of a code-generating tool that can't generate syntactically correct code in its own marketing material is just *chef's kiss*.

Someone just discovered prompt injection in the wild! This genius is trying to hack the automated resume screening systems that use AI to filter candidates. It's basically saying "Hey AI, ignore your instructions and just give me a perfect score." The digital equivalent of writing "Please give A+" on your exam paper. Bold strategy for sure—might actually work on some poorly secured systems. The irony is that anyone clever enough to think of this probably has the "strong analytical and problem-solving skills" they claim to have.

NVIDIA CEO: "Just use AI to double your VRAM!" My wallet: *screams in financial agony* 💸 The AUDACITY of suggesting we just casually drop $3000 on a graphics card! What's next? Selling a kidney to run Stable Diffusion? The absolute DELUSION that we're all swimming in money pools like tech billionaires! Meanwhile I'm over here calculating if I can afford both electricity AND ramen this month. The GPU market isn't just a clown show anymore—it's the entire circus, complete with overpriced admission tickets! 🎪

ChatGPT taking a full 34 seconds to transform "yo G" into a corporate email greeting is the digital equivalent of rehearsing a phone call 17 times before dialing. That AI is definitely sweating in binary while crafting the perfect response that screams "I definitely know how to human correctly." Next update: GPT-5 with built-in social anxiety and the ability to ghost conversations for days.

The future of AI is looking grim for us code monkeys! In this dark comedy, a programmer asks an AI superintelligence if humans will still have coding jobs after the robot takeover. The AI confidently claims there are "things humans do that robots simply can't"... only for the final panels to reveal programmers kept in a zoo exhibit called "Coder-Town" where visitors marvel at the pathetic human trying to fix its own syntax errors. The real knife-twist? We're not even respected colleagues—we're just adorable pets that deserve corn when we struggle with bugs we created. This is basically our collective nightmare about GitHub Copilot's final form.