Schizo Sort Is Goated

Content Will Pearse rombulow Follow V You know how HTTP GET requests are meant to be idempotent? Well, do I have the story for you ... a while back I added WiFi control to our garage doors with little Wemos Dis. 2:09 PM - 29 Apr 2018 1,659 Retweets 2,532 Likes 61 17 1.7K 2.5K Will Pearse rombulow Apr 29 The Wemos expose a simple web page with a link that says "Toggle". The endpoint for the link activates a relay, which is hooked up to the push-button on the garage door, which makes the door raiselowerhalt. 9 1 17 24 175 Will Pearse rombulow Apr 29 (This toggle endpoint responds to GET requests. I threw the code together in minutes and was too lazy to spend another couple minutes figuring out POST. regret) 2 17 13 Y 181 Will Pearse rombulow Apr 29 Safari eventually figured out I used this toggle page regularly, so added it to my favourites. Which are iCloud-synced between all my devices. 9 1 17 25 218 Will Pearse rombulow Apr 29 So every time I opened a new tab on my laptop, desktop, iPhone or iPad the garage door opened or closed. Late at night, early in the morning, or randomly throughout the day... 15 27 177 Y 820 Will Pearse rombulow Apr 29 This, kids, is why GET requests should be idempotent. 37 17 221 M 1.2K

Content Based on a true story: xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy" xxx: You're gonna love this xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login. xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help" "trouble" "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time". xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling wellgonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am. xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew . Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half- caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xxx: holy sht l'm keeping those

Content no, there's dirs, pipes, links, files, sockets, and blocks everything is a file everything is a file 34 34 14 14 0.1 10 score 55 2 70 85 100 115 130 2 0.1 145

Content "AND THEN I TOLD THEM GITHUB WILL STAY AN OPEN PLATFORM

Content A parrot Machine learning algorithm Learns random phrases Doesn't understand about what it learns Occasionally speaks nonsense Is a cute birdie parrot

Content Yeah, I know how to quit vim Okay, then say one way to quit it instagram.comcoderhumor Power off the computer? That's on me, I set the bar too low.