You guys misbehaved, so I removed the snakes until you can think about your choices

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The ultimate corporate espionage speedrun. Upload competitor's codebase, cash out $7M, join the competition. That's not "quitting your job" - that's ragequitting with a profit margin. Silicon Valley's version of dropping the mic, except the mic is worth millions and probably violates several NDAs. The real 10x developer: 10x the betrayal, 10x the payout.

Junior dev discovers Jest mocking and suddenly thinks they're a testing god because they made 2+3=5 pass by... mocking the math module. Yeah, let's just mock away the entire function we're supposed to be testing. What's next, mocking the test itself? This is peak "I wrote tests" energy without understanding that mocking add to return 5 when testing if add(2, 3) equals 5 is like bringing your own answer key to an exam. You're not testing your code, you're just... lying to yourself with extra steps. The hiring manager looking at this portfolio is having a Dipper Pines moment realizing this "100% test coverage" is completely worthless. But hey, at least the tests are green! 🎉

The internet's true form finally revealed! It's just a giant Jenga tower of tech stacked on increasingly questionable foundations. From the web dev actively sabotaging himself at the top to the literal "ELECTRICITY" block at the bottom—because who needs clean abstractions? My favorite part is how we're all just tiny figures in this cosmic joke: Rust devs in their corner thinking they're saving the world, unpaid open-source devs holding everything up, and whatever Microsoft is doing with that angry bird. Meanwhile, C developers are still writing dynamic arrays like it's 1972 and somehow that's supporting... *checks notes*... the entire digital economy. And at the very bottom? A system that turns "shiny metal into cookies for fish." Because of course the internet runs on nuclear power plants feeding fish. It's turtles all the way down, except the turtles are increasingly concerning technological decisions!

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