Programmers Flirting Be Like

Content Code that I finish at 4AM V S uIr1cKOGnOSiS The code when I read it at 10AM

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Content File Edit Tools Syntax Bufters Window Help a includestring includeiostream class Rose public: static std::string smell(void) return "sweet"; 6 09 08 Itypedef Rose OtherName; lint main (void) if (Rose:: smell) OtherName:: smell ()) std:: cout Rose:: smell () std: :endl; return 0; else std::cerr "Not OK" std: :endl; return 1;

Ah, the Chrome trade agreement. Google's browser offers you the worst deal in the history of deals, possibly ever. You hand over 9.6GB of precious RAM and get... a single browser tab. Not even a whole browsing experience—just one lonely tab. The memory leak is so bad you could water plants with it. Meanwhile, your computer fans sound like they're preparing for takeoff while you're just trying to check the weather. And yet, here we are, still using it. Stockholm syndrome is real in tech.

OH. MY. GOD. The government is literally HEMORRHAGING money on VSCode licenses that are FREE FOR EVERYONE ELSE ON THE PLANET! 💸💸💸 Imagine being the poor soul who authorized payment for 250 VSCode licenses when only 33 people are using them... and VSCode is literally FREE and OPEN SOURCE! This is tax dollars evaporating faster than my will to live during a Monday morning standup! 😱 But wait, it gets better! Those 5 cybersecurity licenses for 20K seats when they only have 15K employees? That's like buying a mansion for your pet rock! I simply cannot with this level of bureaucratic chaos! 🤦‍♀️

That magical moment when you run ESLint hoping to fix your code, only to discover it's playing multiplayer instead of single-player mode. You start with 10 errors, hit that glorious "Fix All" button with the confidence of someone who's never been betrayed by technology, and suddenly you're the proud owner of 20 errors. It's like watching your technical debt compound interest in real-time. Six years of professional development experience and I still fall for this every damn time. The only thing more reliable than ESLint breaking your code is your PM asking "how hard could it be to add this small feature?"