If American Say Um

The moment you mention you "work with computers," your entire extended family suddenly transforms into a horde of technological zombies with broken printers and forgotten passwords. It's like being the only doctor at a hypochondriac convention, except instead of asking if that mole looks cancerous, it's "Why is my Facebook doing that thing?" What thing? THE thing. You know. THAT thing. And they all expect immediate tech support during Thanksgiving dinner while your turkey gets cold and your will to live evaporates faster than RAM in a Chrome tab.

HTML sitting there with the actual programming languages like it belongs. Nice try, markup language. You're just fancy text with delusions of grandeur. Next thing you know, CSS will want voting rights too.

Ah, the classic "we have food at home" parental strategy, but make it IDE-flavored! The kid begs for IntelliJ IDEA (the sleek, modern Java IDE with all the bells and whistles), but mom says "No, we have IntelliJ at home." Cut to what's actually waiting at home: Eclipse, the clunky Java dinosaur that's been slowly fossilizing since 2008. It's like asking for a Tesla and getting handed the keys to a rusted Pinto that occasionally bursts into flames when you try to refactor your code. Eclipse isn't just outdated—it's the IDE equivalent of dial-up internet in a 5G world.

Content Version Control Flowchart Do you need it? -No- Yes you do Yes Install Git ProarammerHumor.io

The duality of frontend development: you'll spend 3 hours making a pure CSS Drake meme with perfectly positioned divs and border-radius properties, but when it comes to centering that login button or fixing the navbar on mobile? Suddenly you're Googling "how to center a div" for the 847th time in your career. The irony is that making memes actually is useful—you're practicing layout, positioning, and flexbox while procrastinating. So really, you're being productive. That's what you tell yourself at standup, anyway.

Content Why would a fly land on something like this? BEARS!! This is ridiculous! Rats should be ashamed for falling in this trap This must be fun! aws FREE TIER