Guys What Do We Say About This

We say it's accurate and we don't like it. Tom Cruise doing his own stunts at 60 while programmers are out here with the spine of a question mark and the posture of a shrimp emoji.

Sitting in that Herman Miller chair you convinced yourself would fix everything, hunched over dual monitors debugging someone else's regex at 2 PM on a Tuesday. Your back gave out before your career did. Meanwhile Tom's hanging off planes and sprinting through explosions like his joints aren't held together by prayers and spite.

The real kicker? We're supposedly the "knowledge workers" with the cushy jobs, but our bodies are paying the price like we've been mining coal for decades. Standing desks, yoga ball chairs, ergonomic keyboards—we've tried it all. Still end up looking like Gollum by 35.

Fun fact: Studies show that sitting for more than 8 hours a day increases your risk of early death by 15%. But hey, at least we can work from home in our back braces.