I used to be a PHP developer

Content 9 Programere-Memes - HTML - for structure CSS - for style JavaScript - for fun React - for work C - for dinosaurs C - for college PHP - for nothing Ruby - for Rails Query - for legacy Python - for science TypeScript - for safety Java - for 3 billion devices 1:21 PM Oct 4, 2023 428.4K Views 290 17 678 5K I

Content yeff yephph T What does this even mean to me Hello Jeffrey, Unfortunately due to company policy, we are unable to offer positions to people with the name Jeffrey since it will not work with our database schema 4:03 AM 12 Apr 20 Twitter Web App 1,273 Retweets 19.6K Likes

Content Mayank Joshi dermayank Dear recruiters, if you are looking for: - Java, Python, PHP - React, Angular - PostgreSQL, Redis, MongoDB - AWS, S3, EC2, ECS, EKS -nix system administration -Git and CI with TDD - Docker, Kubernetes That's not a Full Stack Developer That's an entire IT department 3:52 PM 29 Jun 21 Twitter for Mac 1,403 Retweets 117 Quote Tweets 5,532 Likes 17 ProdrammerHumor.io

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OH. MY. GOD. This is literally the PHP developer's mantra in its purest form! While your codebase is LITERALLY ON FIRE with security vulnerabilities, deprecated functions, and spaghetti code that would make an Italian chef weep, you're just over here perfecting your eyeliner game! 💅 PHP devs have mastered the art of selective blindness - ignoring warnings, notices, and that one function that's been "temporarily" patched since PHP 5.3. Meanwhile, they're strutting around with their perfectly styled syntax, acting like they didn't just use a 15-year-old framework to build a modern web app! The gothic aesthetic is just *chef's kiss* perfect - because maintaining PHP in 2024 is basically a horror movie where you're both the victim AND the killer!

Parental controls flagging PHP learning as "forbidden knowledge" is the most unintentionally accurate thing ever. Good parenting right there - protecting innocent children from the psychological trauma of learning PHP. Next thing you know they'll be searching for "how to center a div" and we'll have to stage an intervention. The real restricted content warning should be "This language might make you question your career choices."