Patching Memes

Ah yes, the classic "let's bolt on security features to ancient code" approach. The image shows a beautiful metaphor - buttons neatly lined up on one side, while the other side is just a bunch of random holes with some half-hearted attempts at stitching them together. It's like when your CTO suddenly discovers "zero trust architecture" and demands you implement it on that COBOL system running since the Reagan administration. Sure, we'll just sprinkle some encryption on that database with plaintext passwords and call it "enterprise-grade security." The best part? Next week they'll wonder why the patched security solution keeps falling apart. Turns out duct tape and prayers aren't officially recognized authentication protocols!

The security industry in a nutshell, folks. You hire "analysts" who confirm they're analysts, confirm they get paid to analyze, but when they actually find something—like a Log4j vulnerability that needs immediate patching—management's response is "Nah, P0 incident? That's an EOD problem." Nothing quite like hiring security experts only to ignore their expertise when it requires actual work. The classic corporate cycle: pay for security, ignore security recommendations, wonder why you got breached. Then blame the security team who warned you six months ago. For the uninitiated, Log4j was that delightful little vulnerability from 2021 that had security teams working through Christmas while executives were sipping eggnog and asking "can't we just deal with it after the holidays?"