Game programming Memes

Posts tagged with Game programming

The Road To Early Access Hell Is Paved With Global Variables

The Road To Early Access Hell Is Paved With Global Variables
Now I understand why this game's been in Early Access for a decade. The code's a beautiful disaster - global variables everywhere, hardcoded dialogue IDs, magic numbers, and enough switch-case statements to make a CS professor weep. My favorite part is the instance_destroy() call that just... nukes something when you've had lunch with someone? Classic indie game spaghetti where nothing's refactored because "it works, don't touch it." This is what happens when passion projects grow beyond their initial scope without architectural planning. The road to game dev hell is paved with good intentions and global variables.

Game Devs And The Holy DeltaTime

Game Devs And The Holy DeltaTime
Frame-independent game physics is the hill many junior devs die on. Multiply all movement by deltaTime or watch your character zoom at light speed on a gaming PC and crawl like a snail on a potato. Skip this step and your boss will find you, and they will kill you. Not the crime mentioned in the meme, but an actual crime against humanity.

The Constant Battle Between Original Design And Inspiration

The Constant Battle Between Original Design And Inspiration
That moment when you've designed a perfectly functional game loop but your brain whispers, "What if we made it exactly like Elden Ring?" The eternal battle between creating something original versus cloning your favorite games. The road to development hell is paved with "inspiration" that turns into feature creep. Pro tip: write down your cool gameplay ideas, sleep on them, then decide if they're actually good or just your brain trying to recreate Dark Souls for the 47th time.

How Is It Going

How Is It Going
The perfect encapsulation of game developer paranoia! When someone asks about their game's progress, they immediately assume the person has heard some terrible news. That nervous smile says it all - "My game is totally fine and definitely not a buggy mess held together by duct tape and prayers! Why? Did GitHub leak my commit messages about the physics engine being 'temporarily' disabled since 2021?" This is the digital equivalent of responding to "How are you?" with "Why? What have people been saying about me?!"