Data-security Memes

Every junior dev thinks they've invented encryption when they discover Base64. The number of times I've had to explain that encoding ≠ encryption is probably why my hair's thinning. Base64 is just fancy dress for your data – anyone can undress it with zero effort. It's like hiding your house key under the doormat and calling it a security system. And the response is always the same: "Fine! I'll just use Base128 then!" Sure buddy, throw more digits at the problem. That'll fix it. Just like how writing your password in bigger letters makes it more secure.

The pristine folder structure in the left panel is the stuff of developer fantasies! A beautifully organized project with logical entity relationships and clear naming conventions. Meanwhile, the actual JSON file on the right is a truncated mess with fields like "password" and "birthdate" just hanging out in plain text. Nothing says "technical debt" quite like storing sensitive user data without proper encryption or hashing. The real answer to "What's stopping your codebase from looking like this?" is probably three deadlines ago, five energy drinks, and that one PM who keeps saying "we'll refactor later."