Anti-patterns Memes

Posts tagged with Anti-patterns

When You Get Paid By Lines Of Code

Javascript Programming Frontend Backend

13 days ago 115.5K views 0 shares

When You Get Paid By Lines Of Code

The most elegant solution: return user || null; The solution when your manager mentions "performance bonuses tied to code output metrics": whatever this monstrosity is. Somewhere, a junior dev is wondering why their PR keeps getting rejected while the tech debt architect who wrote this garbage is getting promoted.

Get Motivated To Write Terrible Code

Python Programming Debugging Testing

4 months ago 306.2K views 0 shares

Get Motivated To Write Terrible Code

Top: A horrifying cascade of hardcoded if-statements checking individual values from 457 to 463, alternating between returning True and False. Bottom: The reason for this atrocity - a script that generates these if-statements by asking how many you need, then writing them to a file with alternating boolean returns. And they say automation is supposed to make our lives better. This is the programming equivalent of using a CNC machine to carve "Live, Laugh, Love" signs.

Anti-Pattern Alpha

Programming Debugging Testing

7 months ago 148.6K views 0 shares

Anti-Pattern Alpha

There's commenting code, and then there's weaponizing comments. While you're over there documenting your elegant solutions, some developers are crafting elaborate manifestos defending why they chose to implement a singleton that manages 47 global variables with a switch statement that's 300 lines long. The truly diabolical part? The comments are so well-written that the next developer thinks, "This person clearly thought this through." No, Chad, they just have excellent PR skills for their terrible code crimes.