Never Obsolete

OH THE HUMANITY! Imagine spending a FORTUNE on a glorious 144Hz monitor—capable of buttery-smooth gaming perfection—only to discover you've been living a LIE for an ENTIRE YEAR! Your precious screen has been limping along at a peasantly 60Hz this whole time because you forgot to change one tiny setting. The gaming gods are WEEPING. That silky-smooth experience you paid for? COMPLETELY WASTED. Your eyes have been BETRAYED. The framerates... THE FRAMERATES! 😭

Computer Science: where nothing else has made the code work, so you might as well try licking it. Honestly, this tracks. After exhausting Stack Overflow, rewriting the entire function, sacrificing a rubber duck, and questioning your career choices, the scientific method becomes "whatever, let's just see what happens." Computer Engineering gets the "tingle of electricity on your tongue" test, which is disturbingly accurate for hardware debugging. The rest of the sciences have actual safety protocols, but CS? Just try random stuff until the compiler stops screaming at you. It's not debugging, it's percussive maintenance for your sanity. The real kicker is that this method works more often than it should. Changed a variable name? Fixed. Deleted a comment? Suddenly compiles. Added a random semicolon? Production ready. Science.

The eternal duality of PC gaming enthusiasts. When NVIDIA and AMD release graphics cards with 8GB VRAM? "BLASPHEMY! HERESY! NOT ENOUGH FOR MODERN GAMES!" *angry flower noises* But when Valve's Steam Deck competitor comes with the same specs? "Oh it's perfectly fine! Casual gamers don't need more!" *happy flower noises* Nothing captures the tech community's selective outrage quite like suddenly becoming memory requirement experts when it's convenient for their argument. The hypocrisy is *chef's kiss* delicious.

Ah yes, the final boss of ergonomics! Nothing says "we hate developers" quite like forcing them to code on a split keyboard that looks like it survived a medieval torture chamber. The project manager probably read an article about "optimizing developer productivity" and decided that physical pain is the secret ingredient. Next week's challenge: coding with oven mitts while standing on one foot. Because if your wrists aren't crying, are you even programming?

That moment of existential dread when your antivirus finds absolutely nothing suspicious, but opening Task Manager makes your CPU temperature spike to 100°C. It's like having a burglar who hides perfectly when the cops show up, but immediately starts a bonfire the second they leave. Your computer is basically gaslighting you – "No viruses here! Now excuse me while I melt through your desk for... uh... normal computer reasons."

Remember the early 2000s PC building phase where your rig wasn't complete without looking like a nuclear reactor from Tron? That white case with blue LEDs was practically a personality trait back then. Nothing said "I'm a serious gamer who knows computers" like unnecessary lighting that made your bedroom glow like a UFO landing site at 3am. The best part? Those rigs ran Doom 3 at a blistering 24 FPS while simultaneously doubling as space heaters. The more LEDs you had, the better programmer you obviously were - that's just science.