Virtual Dumbass Gets Promoted

Ah, the good ol' days of coding... Two guys safely installing an AC unit while standing on a narrow ledge, labeled as the coding equivalent of copy-pasting from Stack Overflow vs. writing your own code. The self-written code guy is literally hanging off the edge of certain death just to feel the satisfaction of originality. Meanwhile, the Stack Overflow copiers look slightly more stable but equally questionable in their life choices. Let's be honest - before AI coding assistants, we were all just one misplaced semicolon away from plummeting into the abyss of debugging. The only difference was whether we fell with borrowed code or with our own janky implementation that somehow worked despite violating every principle in the textbook.

Ah, the classic corporate dilemma: "We need more engineers!" *proceeds to post job listings* while simultaneously a headline announces an AI that can supposedly replace them. The irony is delicious. Companies are still desperately hiring humans while breathlessly hyping the AI that will make us obsolete. Fifteen years in this industry and I've seen this movie before—neural networks, blockchain, quantum computing—all going to revolutionize everything... until they don't. Meanwhile, some poor hiring manager is still trying to find a senior dev with 10 years experience in a 3-year-old framework for entry-level pay. The circle of tech life continues.

Ah, the classic "stepped in AI-generated SQL" moment! Every developer's nightmare when they look down and realize they've been walking through code that was auto-magically created by an AI. That sinking feeling when you discover your database is about to be obliterated by queries that technically work but are about as elegant as a drunk elephant trying to perform ballet. The AI confidently generated perfect syntactical garbage that'll run flawlessly while bringing your production server to its knees. It's like having a helpful assistant who organizes your closet by setting everything on fire. "But it compiled without errors!" 🔥

Nine data professionals standing around watching while one Excel guru does all the actual work. Classic corporate data science theater. The entire AI department, with their fancy degrees and machine learning models, rendered useless by someone who mastered VLOOKUP and pivot tables. That's what happens when you spend $2 million on a data lake but can't figure out how to drain a real one.

While scientists fret about AI overlords, some of us have found a more practical solution to the robot uprising. Nothing says "checkmate, Skynet" like a well-aimed shower head to the motherboard. Sure, they might develop consciousness, but they haven't figured out waterproofing yet. The oldest IT solution in the book: have you tried turning it off and making it wet forever?

Sorting imports by character length instead of alphabetically or by module type? That's like organizing your sock drawer by how much each sock weighs. Sure, it looks oddly satisfying with that gradient effect, but your code reviewer is probably drafting your performance review right now. The real horror isn't the sorting method – it's that you're importing both matplotlib AND sklearn in the same file. That poor memory usage never stood a chance.