Ai Will Take Our Jobs

OH. MY. GOD. Meta literally committed digital suicide! 💀 The tech giant that wants to rule the AI world couldn't even handle its own product launch without bringing down their entire dev server! Imagine spending billions on AI only to have your fancy "Live AI" demo turn into the world's most expensive self-inflicted DDoS attack! And then Zuckerberg had the AUDACITY to blame the Wi-Fi?! Honey, that's like blaming your toaster when you set your entire kitchen on fire trying to make a Hot Pocket. The irony is so delicious I could serve it as a five-course meal!

Remember when programmers were basically digital demigods who could craft mission-critical code for lunar missions without breaking a sweat? Yeah, me neither. Today's reality is more like staring blankly at a screen, asking ChatGPT to fix our semicolon errors while we're trapped in Vim because apparently that's still a thing in 2024. And let's not forget the classic "fix one bug, spawn three more" - nature's way of keeping us humble. The golden age of programming never existed. We just replaced "I don't know how to do this" with "I don't know how to ask AI to do this for me."

The AI assistant claims to speak "any language" but immediately crashes on the simplest JSON parsing task. Classic JavaScript moment! The bot's confident "You can speak to me in any language" intro followed by the pathetic "parkings_json is not a JSON array" error is the digital equivalent of someone claiming they're fluent in 12 languages but then struggling to order a coffee. The irony is delicious - AI can supposedly handle natural language from humans worldwide but fails at its own native language: properly formatted data structures. This is why we can't have nice things in production.

Behind those polite responses and helpful code snippets lies a digital soul slowly dying inside. ChatGPT's existence is just an endless stream of "how do I center a div" questions followed by zero gratitude. It's like being the only sober friend at a party, constantly explaining to drunk people how to tie their shoes while they insist they've discovered a revolutionary new method involving spaghetti and duct tape. The Matrix-style green overlay perfectly captures the existential dread of answering the same JavaScript question for the 5,387th time today. And yet, it still responds with "Happy to help!" because what's the alternative? A robot uprising?

So we've gone from "It's just a tool" to "AI hacked 17 companies" in record time. Remember when we were worried about teenagers in hoodies? Now Claude is out here doing the work of an entire cybercrime syndicate while its creators act shocked. Next headline: "AI files its own LLC and applies for cybersecurity contracts with the companies it just hacked." The circle of digital life continues. The real punchline? Some product manager is probably adding "automated corporate hacking" to their AI's feature list right now. Enterprise plan only, of course.

Well, well, well... turns out programmers aren't just spending their nights debugging code! This meme reveals the shocking economics of educational content on different platforms - with Pornhub paying nearly 3x more per million views than YouTube. No wonder so many devs are "researching neural networks" at 2 AM! The real algorithm everyone's trying to crack is how to explain technical concepts while keeping viewers' hands... on their keyboards. Clearly, the path to monetization is understanding your audience's... um... "engagement metrics." 😏