Welcome Aboard The Error Express

The modern beginner's dilemma in one perfect image! Trying to pick your first programming language is like being that panicked creature staring at a floor scattered with tech options. JavaScript? Python? Maybe C#? Or perhaps one of those trendy frameworks? The cruel irony is that veterans know it barely matters which pill you swallow first - you'll end up learning half of them anyway. Yet we all remember that initial paralysis by analysis, frantically Googling "best programming language 2024" at 2AM while questioning our life choices. Pro tip: Just pick one and start building something. Six months later, you'll hate whatever you chose and switch anyway!

The four stages of becoming a JavaScript developer: 1. Innocent excitement: "Ooh, a book about JavaScript!" 2. First encounter with callback hell: *uncontrollable sobbing* 3. Acceptance phase: *builds fortress of solitude with multiple monitors* 4. Final form: Bearded wisdom, thousand-yard stare, and a strong drink to numb the pain of yet another framework release. They grow up so fast when you feed them promises that never resolve.

Ah, the eternal cycle of library addiction! You find that shiny new package that solves all your problems (or so you think), and suddenly you're evangelizing it like you've discovered fire. Meanwhile, your codebase is already a digital hoarder's paradise with 1000 dependencies, and your coworkers are plotting your "accidental" deletion from the Git contributors list. The best part? Next week you'll be doing it all over again with another library because clearly, the solution to dependency hell is... more dependencies!

When someone drops the bombshell that your precious native apps are essentially just fancy wrappers for web content, your entire developer identity crumbles. The existential crisis hits hard enough to require a bottle of whiskey and some serious soul-searching. It's that moment of horrific clarity when you realize you've spent years arguing about native vs web while Electron apps quietly took over the world. And deep down you know... it's all just HTTP requests with prettier buttons.

The mountain of web development gets steeper with each framework. HTML? Just a gentle slope. CSS? A bit more challenging. Bootstrap? Now we're cruising downhill! But then comes React Native and suddenly you're falling off a cliff. That moment when you think you've mastered frontend development only to have React Native remind you that cross-platform mobile dev is where dreams go to die. Ten years of experience and I'm still googling "why is my flexbox not working on Android but fine on iOS."

Ah, the irony of modern web development. First panel: "How to make a responsive website" - presented with all the confidence of someone who just discovered media queries yesterday. Second panel: The same "expert's" actual website demanding you increase your window size or switch to desktop because apparently their definition of "responsive" is "works exclusively on screens the size of a small billboard." Nothing says frontend expertise quite like telling mobile users their devices are the problem. The digital equivalent of "you're holding it wrong."