We've All Been There

The infamous Suez Canal blockage meets software development! Programmers are the aircraft carrier trying to make actual progress, while project managers are the Ever Given ship blocking the entire canal with bureaucracy. Nothing kills productivity quite like the unholy trinity of timeline reviews, Jira updates, and the dreaded "let's have another status meeting." Meanwhile, actual code sits unwritten, bugs remain unfixed, and deadlines drift further into fantasy land. The greatest maritime disaster of 2021 perfectly symbolizes what happens when management processes become so bloated they prevent any actual work from getting done. But sure, let's discuss our sprint velocity while the ship is literally stuck.

Content Kat Maddox ctrishifti Ridiculous that we're discussing whether or not developers who can't code in raw binary should be allowed into the industry. I spent my first few years in university learning how to code in binary, and it would be an insult to myself and people like me to drop this requirement. 18:40 3920 Twitter Web App 229 Retweets 51 Quote Tweets 2,662 Likes 17 Tweet your reply Kat Maddox ctrIshifti 1h I take this back, sorry. People in the comments have mentioned that a much more valuable metric is whether or not you can write CPU instructions by individually wiring the transistors. Clearly I have more learning to do. ProarammerHumor io

Content STACK OVERFLOW W3SCHOOLS INDIAN YOUTUBER COFFEE PROGRAMMERS

The tweet claims OpenGL stands for "Good Luck" because you'll desperately need it when working with this graphics library. Anyone who's ever fought with shader compilation errors, platform-specific bugs, or tried deciphering the 900-page specification knows this pain intimately. The "GL" actually stands for "Graphics Library," but let's be honest—"Good Luck" is far more accurate when you're three hours into debugging why your triangles render upside down on AMD cards but not NVIDIA. The spiritual successor to "Works On My Machine™".

Oh. My. GOD. This absolute MADMAN is out here coding UI in pure C while the rest of us are frantically learning our 47th JavaScript framework! 💅 Look at this CHAOS WIZARD manually drawing rectangles and buttons with raw C code like it's 1985! Meanwhile React developers are having existential crises when their npm packages are 3 minutes out of date. The AUDACITY of this programmer to declare "not getting replaced by AI" while doing something so unnecessarily complicated that even AI would look at it and say "no thanks, I'll stick to generating cat pictures." The video title says it all - this isn't about efficiency, it's about SPITE. Pure, beautiful, petty programmer spite. And with nearly half a million views, apparently spite sells!

Content Imagine not being object oriented Imagine not having a garbage collector uBip901 Imagine having to put a semicolon at the end of every line Imagine using the keyboard