Nah Im On The Dev Branch

Programming languages are just fruit with "Hello World" stickers slapped on them, and we're all toddlers crawling around grabbing whichever one catches our eye first. Python's that one fruit your mom convinced you to try because "it's easier to digest." Meanwhile, JavaScript, Java, C++, and PHP are just sitting there, waiting for you to grow up and experience real indigestion.

Content This guy is a software engineer, you can tell by his awesome estimation skills

Content Okay guys, this is going to be a big sprint. Sarah, you're going to be finding the Kth largest element. How many points do you think? David, we've been getting pressure from customers about whether or not this substring is a palindrome. Can you have it done by end of day? GEESE ProarammerHumor.io

Content 122' '2' '2'? You're hired! IT Department Cyanide and Happiness Explosm.net

Content You already have a monitor Yes, but what about a second monitor?

Remember when Reddit engineers were optimization wizards? Now they're blaming your tiny custom emojis for server meltdowns. Classic corporate evolution - from "we built a platform that can handle millions of simultaneous users" to "your 20KB GIF is why everything's on fire." Next they'll claim upvotes are causing global warming. The real resource hog? Probably their tracking scripts collecting data on which cat memes make you smile.