I Feel Attacked But Yes

Content 220.000 Marketing Manager 6500.0009 CEO 5200 090 CIO 120,00 UX Manager Project Manager 120,900 IT Manager 110.00 Product Owner 395,000 Business Analyst Product Manager 75,000 Senior Programmer

Content DEV: I'M DONE WITH THE ISSUE MANAGER: GOOD WHEN CAN IT BE TESTED? aflip.com ITS COMPLETED RIGHT?

Content Me looking through a pull request and seeing if (string.length 0) Confused screaming

The rare sighting of a programming purist in the wild! This developer has achieved mythical status by rejecting all modern conveniences: No cursor? Check. No AI assistants? Check. No search engine? Check. Just a human, a rusty ThinkPad, Vim, man pages, and Arch Linux. This is like watching someone hunt with a sharpened stick while everyone else uses rifles. Either this person is the final boss of programming or they're just showing off their digital masochism in public. The "psychopath" label is just what normal devs call someone who makes them feel guilty about their 57 Chrome tabs of Stack Overflow answers.

Content Working on my side project "This is probably gonna take 30-40 minutes" 11 hours later:

THE AUDACITY of companies thinking they're "agile" just because they force everyone to use Jira! 💀 It's like buying gym equipment and expecting to get fit without actually exercising! Meanwhile, project managers are frantically creating 57 different epics, backlogs, and sprints while the actual code sits untouched for WEEKS. The truth hurts so bad that if PMs could actually comprehend this sign, they'd have an existential crisis right in the middle of their 3-hour sprint planning meeting. But don't worry - they're too busy color-coding tickets to notice!