Computer Time Is Limited

Content A friend of mine is a creative genius and always found solutions to problems you wouldn't think existed. A level computing. first semester and our assignment is to build a calculator in VB. We have a few weeks to get it done, most of us did it in a day or two though. The night before the deadline my mate sends me a text saying he's pulling an all nighter to get it done and he'll see me in college the following day with the wOrK. He arrives early looking like shit but with a proud smile. He wants to show off his calculator and plugs in his USB stick. He proudly says that he managed to get over 9500 if statements done for his calculator, and he would have done more if he started earlier. Turns out he decided that working out each mathematical calculation possible and putting them all into if statements was the right way of doing the assignment g Like Reply 13 6 - 1 min - Edited

Oh. My. GOD. The AUDACITY of calling a cup of coffee with utensils sticking out of it "breakfast"! 💀 The sheer DELUSION that programmers operate under is just *chef's kiss* magnificent! Who needs actual sustenance when you can mainline caffeine directly into your bloodstream while frantically debugging that nightmare code you wrote at 2AM? Nutrition? Please! That's for people who don't have 47 Stack Overflow tabs open! The fork and knife are just there for the ILLUSION of consuming actual food while your body slowly transforms into a caffeine-processing machine that occasionally produces code!

Content while (1) while (true) while (22 ! 5)

When your entire job is testing one new feature per year at Apple! 😂 The meme shows the legendary "waiting" Pablo Escobar meme format but reimagined for Apple's QA team who supposedly have the cushiest job ever - just chilling around all year waiting for that single new feature to test. Meanwhile at other tech companies, QA engineers are drowning in sprints and backlogs! That's what I call work-life balance taken to the extreme!

Content OH HUSBANT YOU USED TOO MANY SERVERLESS FUNCTION EXECUTIONS NOW WE'RE HOMELESS

When you need to check if a number is odd, but writing n % 2 !== 0 is too mainstream, so you create a 1.3M downloads/month npm package that emails Google and Reddit support to ask them. The function has 50 lines of code to send emails, parse responses, and return a Promise, when it could be a one-liner. Modern JavaScript development in its purest form - why solve a problem in 1 line when you can create an entire microservice ecosystem?