Been There Done That

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The AUDACITY of someone asking if you're coding while you're in the TRENCHES preparing for the apocalypse that is RTO! Like, excuse me?! I've got five monitors set up, seventeen contingency plans for when my VPN inevitably fails, and I'm practicing looking productive on camera while secretly updating my resume. Return to office isn't a policy—it's a HOSTAGE SITUATION. The only code I'm writing is the one that calculates how many sick days I can take before HR notices. The WFH paradise is crumbling and you want me to debug your function? THE HORROR!

Content Developer: ( leaving office on time) Project manager: "We don't do that here"

Content BANNED FROM SWIFT Programming in Objective-C

Content RUN RUN AS ADMINISTRATOR

The horror! Using exceptions as a data transport mechanism is like using a fire alarm as an intercom. Some backend dev actually built a system where they're intentionally throwing exceptions to pass data between services! That's like deliberately crashing your car to change lanes. Exception handling is meant for exceptional circumstances, not as your primary API. The stack traces alone would make any performance profiler weep. Imagine the logs: "ERROR: Everything's actually fine, we just needed to send some JSON to the payment service." This is the programming equivalent of using a sledgehammer to insert a thumbtack.