I Mean, That's The Truth

So THAT'S the secret to immortality! Forget Mediterranean diets, yoga, or drinking eight glasses of water a day. Just avoid Microsoft Teams like it's the plague and you'll live to see your great-great-great-grandchildren. Honestly, using Teams for more than five minutes probably ages you faster than a junior dev deploying to production on a Friday afternoon. The app that crashes when you breathe, freezes when you share your screen, and somehow uses more RAM than Chrome running 47 tabs of Stack Overflow. This grandma figured out the ultimate life hack: complete and utter Teams avoidance. She's out here living her best 110-year-old life while the rest of us are stuck in meetings that could've been emails, watching our souls slowly drain away as Teams decides to update itself mid-presentation. Pure survival instinct, really.