Tech meetings Memes

Posts tagged with Tech meetings

One Of Our Lead Programmers

One Of Our Lead Programmers
OH. MY. GOD. The absolute AUDACITY of this lead programmer! Three whole months of "vibe coding"?! You know what that means, right? Just casually writing whatever code FEELS right without any plan, documentation, or actual thought process. 💀 Meanwhile, the entire team has been having SEVENTEEN meetings about architecture patterns and proper coding standards! The face of pure shock in that meeting room must have been PRICELESS when this coding rebel just confessed to essentially throwing spaghetti at the wall for a quarter of the year! The real tragedy? His code probably still works better than the over-engineered solutions everyone else spent weeks planning. The universe is so unfair sometimes!

Why The Hell Do We Have To Use Camel Case

Why The Hell Do We Have To Use Camel Case
The corporate tech meeting from hell. Two folks suggest superficial fixes like "color theory" and "enhanced GUI" while the third person—clearly the only one who's ever shipped anything—dares to suggest maybe, just maybe, the team needs actual time to innovate instead of endless sprints. Of course, he gets thrown out the window. Because in tech, suggesting we slow down and build something good is basically treason. Six years in the industry and I've never once seen a PM say "you know what, let's take a sprint off and fix our technical debt." Nope, just keep sprinting until your knees give out!

Devops

Devops
Oh, the classic "I've been nodding along in meetings for 6 months" syndrome! This poor soul has reached that critical point in every tech project where admitting ignorance feels more terrifying than continuing the charade. Meanwhile, production is probably on fire, deployments are failing, and this person's search history is just "what is devops" and "how to pretend you understand kubernetes." The irony is that actual DevOps engineers spend half their careers explaining what DevOps actually is... to people who should already know!