Wife Divorced Me For My Apple Vision

The duality of developers in their natural habitat. She's flaunting her $10,000 Apple Watch or Rolex to check the time like some kind of productivity royalty, while he's secretly a 90s kid who learned to code on that blue plastic children's computer that could barely run "Math Blaster." The irony? Both devices tell time with roughly the same accuracy, but one of them came with a steering wheel and taught an entire generation that computers are supposed to be bright blue with yellow flames on the side. No wonder our CSS looks like this.

Content Apple: we're the most secure OS! No bugs, don't look. Corellium: provides researches with a proper research environment to find bugs and test their apps Researchers: find and report bugs using Corellium Apple: no no no no nooo NO sues Corellium

Content How to fix any computer Windows Step 1. Reboot Did that fix it? Nor Proceed to step a Step a Format hard drive. Reinstall Windows Lose all your files Quietly weep Apple Step 1. Take it to an Apple store Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step a Step a Buy a new Mac Overdraw your account Quietly weep Linux Step 1. Learn to code in C. Recompile the kernel. Build your own microprocessor out of spare silicon you had lying around Recompile the kernel again. Switch distros. Recompile the kernel again but this time using a CPU powered by refracted light from Saturn. Grow a giant beard. Blame Sun Microsystems. Turn your bedroom into a server closet and spend ten years falling asleep to the sound of whirring fans. Switch distros again. Abandon all hygiene. Write a regular expression that would make other programmers cry blood. Learn to code in Java. Recompile the kernel again (but this time while wearing your lucky socks). Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step a Step a. Revert back to Using Windows or a Mac Quietly weep

Content Cooper enlightenedcoop mfs be like I am ex-Google ex- Meta bro they were just 3 month internshios 12:18 AM 122222 21.7K Views 232 Likes

Content Assembly developers be like If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe

The corporate tech evolution in one perfect comic! Top panel: Apple guy compliments Susan, she's flattered. Bottom panel: Windows Vista guy says the exact same thing, and suddenly she's calling HR. It's basically the tech version of the "be attractive, don't be unattractive" rule. Apple gets away with everything while Windows Vista—literally the most universally hated OS in history—gets reported faster than it crashes. The irony is brutal. In tech, your market reputation determines whether the exact same behavior is "charming" or "call security immediately." Microsoft fans in shambles right now.