Pain

Content HEAR MY VOICE. I'M YOUR PROGRAMMER CONSCIENCE GET BACK TO WORK. YOU IDIOT! DEADLINE IS TOMORROW! THIS CODE IS A PIECE OF SH.T! YOU MUST DELETE IT! DELETE IT!

The bravest developer suddenly turns into a quivering mess when faced with pair programming and code reviews. Nothing strikes fear into the heart of a programmer quite like having someone watch them type if (isTrue = true) instead of if (isTrue == true) in real-time. The silent judgment. The awkward pauses. The sudden inability to remember how to write a for loop you've written 500 times before. Even the most confident coder transforms into a sweaty, keyboard-fumbling disaster when another human witnesses their thought process.

Ah, the great LinkedIn job title evolution! Forget "Software Engineer" – now everyone's a "Vibe Code Cleanup Specialist." Apparently fixing spaghetti code is now a spiritual experience. Next week we'll all be "Quantum Emotion Syntax Healers" with 10+ years experience in a framework released yesterday. The real joke is that HR actually believes these titles mean something while the rest of us are just trying to figure out how to center a div.

Content Architects during management meeting Architects during code review

Content In this company we treat our employees as part of family... we like to think of ourselves as a promising growing startup company.. therefore the salary we can offer you is slightly lower than the competition

The pinnacle of useless documentation right here. Just like when your colleague writes // increment i by 1 next to i++ but completely fails to explain why that Byzantine sorting algorithm exists in the first place. The real tragedy is when you return to your own code six months later and find comments like "Fix this later" with no explanation of what "this" is or why it needs fixing. Meanwhile, the actual complex logic remains a mysterious black hole with zero documentation. Pro tip: If your comments could be replaced by a fortune cookie message and provide the same level of insight, you're doing it wrong.