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Content if a snake was responsive would it be like this Or like this? S

Finally, an executive order we can all get behind. Node.js developers nationwide are frantically updating their resumes while Python and Go developers smugly nod in approval. The real tragedy? Thousands of npm packages suddenly wondering what they did wrong. Meanwhile, backend purists who've been saying "JavaScript belongs in the browser" for years are printing this out and framing it above their mechanical keyboards.

The eternal curse of alphabetical order during standups! If your name starts with Y or Z, you're basically the Majin Buu of your dev team—forced to sit there menacingly as the hourglass of your patience drains while 23 other developers give their updates first. By the time it's your turn, half the team has mentally checked out, three people are secretly checking Slack, and you've had enough time to refactor your entire codebase in your head. The real power move? Legally changing your name to "AAaron" just to go first.

Behold, the revolutionary new device for developers who miss the command line days. It's not a laptop without a screen—it's a feature. Now you can code without the distraction of actually seeing what you're doing. Perfect for those who claim they can program blindfolded or have their terminal color scheme set to black text on black background. Bonus: battery life measured in weeks instead of hours.

Content Management Me happily working as an independent programmer We need you to lead a team..

Content Lawyers: Learn from law school Doctors: Learn from Med school Programmers: just keep Googling stuff and it keeps working,