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The eternal struggle between the barbarians who use git push like cavemen and the enlightened souls who've ascended to git config --global alias.puhs push because typing is hard and typos are inevitable. Let's be honest, we've all fat-fingered commands at 2AM and wondered why our code isn't in production. The real 10x developers aren't the ones who never make mistakes—they're the ones who automate their mistakes away. Work smarter, not harder!

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The beautiful irony that parents never saw coming. While mom lectures about how computer time won't lead to employment, software engineers are silently making six figures by... *checks notes*... staying on computers all day. That awkward monkey puppet side-eye perfectly captures the internal dialogue: "Should I tell her that's literally my entire job description, or just nod and go back to my 'useless' coding?" The greatest generational plot twist since discovering avocado toast doesn't actually prevent homeownership.

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Ah, the sacred GitHub contribution graph—where the greenness of your squares matters more than your actual skills! This marketing person just proved that tech hiring is basically a casino where the house edge is "having a pretty heat map." Forget degrees, experience, or actual coding ability—just make sure your contribution graph looks like a well-maintained lawn. $900k for a pretty pattern of green squares? Meanwhile, actual developers are frantically pushing commits to empty repos at 11:59 PM just to keep their streaks alive. The ultimate tech industry cheat code: don't learn to code, just learn to look like you code. Absolutely brilliant.