= += =

The ultimate cosmic horror for system admins everywhere. Galactus, devourer of worlds, has demands that would make Cthulhu shudder: rewriting the Linux kernel in JavaScript. Just imagine - your mission-critical infrastructure running on a language where [] + [] equals an empty string and [] + {} equals "[object Object]". The kernel panics would be replaced with "undefined is not a function" and your uptime would be measured in milliseconds. No wonder they couldn't negotiate. Some prices are too high, even for the survival of humanity.

Content 1. Become a software Engineer 2. double salary; 3. ??? 4. Profit!

The absolute AUDACITY of computers to just... betray you like this! 😤 Your code is giving you a completely wrong output for ONE specific input, and you're questioning your entire existence. Then—WITHOUT CHANGING A SINGLE CHARACTER—you run it again and it works perfectly?! WHAT KIND OF BLACK MAGIC IS THIS?! The computer is literally gaslighting you, making you believe you're losing your mind. Heisenbug in its natural habitat—only observable when you're not looking for it. The digital equivalent of your car making that weird noise until you take it to the mechanic.

Content Consulting Humor CONSULTING HUMOR ConsultingHumor I wanna give a shout-out to every indian dude out there making obscure but oddly specific tutorials on youtube that always seem to be exactly what I'm looking for, except they're all in hindi. Still appreciate cha tho

Content PM CONGRATULATING ME FOR WORKING SO HARD ON DELIVERING A NEW FEATURE ME UNCOMMENTING CODE SOME OLD DEVELOPER LEFT COMMENTED OUT

Ah, the classic "beginner's paralysis." Remember when learning to code was just picking up a book on BASIC or Pascal? Now it's like walking into a pharmacy with 47 different cold medicines when all you wanted was something to stop your runny nose. The tech industry has perfected the art of reinventing the wheel every six months, leaving newbies staring at a buffet of languages and frameworks with absolutely no idea which one won't be obsolete by the time they finish the tutorial. Pro tip from someone who's been coding since punch cards: just pick one and start. The second language is always easier, and the twentieth barely registers as new. Meanwhile, the industry will keep churning out shiny new options like a slot machine that only pays in technical debt.