Template-engine Memes

The Java engineer pleads for his life until Thymeleaf enters the chat. For the uninitiated, Thymeleaf is a Java template engine that's supposed to make HTML generation easier. Instead, it creates a special circle of developer hell where simple tasks require arcane syntax and debugging feels like deciphering ancient hieroglyphics. The engineer would literally rather face a firing squad than wrestle with Thymeleaf's bizarre attribute processors and context objects for one more sprint. Death becomes the preferable alternative to `th:each` loops and Spring integration headaches.