Corporate nonsense Memes

Posts tagged with Corporate nonsense

Boss Vibe Coded Once

Boss Vibe Coded Once
Boss spent a weekend playing with Claude AI and now thinks the entire dev team is obsolete. The plan? Fire everyone, let customers "vibe-generate" their own features directly, and somehow this will scale better than having actual engineers. The corporate email is a masterpiece of buzzword salad: "Claude is faster than all of us combined" and customers will just tell the AI what they want. Because we all know how well requirements gathering goes when you cut out the middleman who actually understands the codebase, infrastructure, and why Karen from sales can't have a button that "makes everything purple and also exports to blockchain." The DevOps person's relief at the end is chef's kiss—they know they're safe because someone still needs to keep the infrastructure running when this brilliant AI-first strategy inevitably crashes and burns. Good luck getting Claude to debug your Kubernetes cluster at 3 AM. Sent from my iPhone, naturally.

Fifteen Rupees Of Pure Ambition

Fifteen Rupees Of Pure Ambition
Ah yes, the prestigious title of "Software Developer Associate" with the princely compensation of ₹15/month. That's not a typo—it's approximately $0.18 USD monthly. For that astronomical sum, you too can work remotely with "no fixed duration" (translation: we'll exploit you indefinitely). Somewhere, a CEO is wondering why they can't find "passionate developers willing to grow with the company." Meanwhile, developers are wondering if this salary covers even one ramen packet per month. Spoiler: it doesn't.

Domain Confusion: The .NET Developer's Nightmare

Domain Confusion: The .NET Developer's Nightmare
The absolute AUDACITY of non-technical management! Here we have a .NET developer being handed the most RIDICULOUS request from a boss who clearly thinks domains are like Pokémon—gotta catch 'em all! 🙄 That look of existential dread when your boss casually asks you to develop for completely different tech stacks like they're just asking for sprinkles on their ice cream. Sure, let me just magically transform from a .NET specialist into a full-stack polyglot OVERNIGHT because domains are TOTALLY interchangeable! The developer's face is screaming "Do I look like I have 17 different frameworks tattooed on my forehead?!" Pure. Unbridled. Pain.

Has Test Automation Ever Worked?

Has Test Automation Ever Worked?
The eternal project management cycle: asking developers for two days to write unit tests? Skeptical SpongeBob with raised eyebrow. Hiring expensive consultants to build a test automation framework that'll be abandoned in 3 months? ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTED SpongeBob. The same PM who won't allocate time for basic testing will somehow find budget for a six-figure automation solution that nobody on the team knows how to maintain. Then we'll all act surprised when the codebase is still a dumpster fire six months later.

The One Ring Of Tech Buzzwords

The One Ring Of Tech Buzzwords
The eternal battle between sales and engineering continues! Sales execs looking at new projects like they're discovering the One Ring to rule them all – "Let's sprinkle some blockchain and AI on it!" Meanwhile, developers are channeling their inner Aragorn with a firm "NO" that contains the exhaustion of a thousand pointless standups. It's the corporate version of "We have blockchain at home. The blockchain at home: an Excel spreadsheet with a password." The irony? Most projects that "need" blockchain and AI could be solved with a decent database and some if/else statements.