Waaaaay Worse Than Bad Stocks

When your gaming laptop hits 9000°C but you're determined to finish that race without thermal throttling. Engineers at Dell never anticipated this level of problem-solving brilliance. Who needs fancy liquid cooling when you can balance your laptop on an industrial fan that probably uses more electricity than your entire neighborhood? Nothing says "I understand computer hardware" like positioning your device directly above what is essentially a tiny helicopter. The irony of running Need for Speed while ensuring your laptop doesn't actually burst into flames is just *chef's kiss*.

Remember when game devs hand-crafted assembly code to squeeze every cycle out of the PS2? Now they just throw more lights at the problem and hope DLSS will save them. Modern devs staring at their RTX 5090 wondering why their unoptimized mess runs like a slideshow. "But I added ray-tracing!" Yeah, and your grass simulation is calculating the aerodynamics of each individual blade. Maybe learn to write a shader that doesn't require NASA's computing budget.

Game engines: either drowning in endless menus or making you frantically jump through hoops to accomplish basic tasks. The comic nails it by sorting them into just two categories - "menus" (looking at you, Unity) or "parkour" (hello, Unreal). Anyone who's tried to find that one specific setting buried in Unity's seventeen nested dropdown menus knows the pain. Meanwhile, Unreal devs are performing mental gymnastics just to implement a simple "Hello World" blueprint. And poor Unity, getting called out for "jumping around a lot" yet still being classified as "menus" - the ultimate burn for an engine trying so hard to be developer-friendly. It's like being told you dance like a spreadsheet.

Oh look, it's the classic Steam tag repetition bug showing its true colors! When your game preferences are so strong that the recommendation algorithm just gives up and starts stuttering. This poor soul's Steam tags are basically just "Hunting" and "Dragons" on repeat—like when you're debugging and your code keeps echoing the same value because you forgot to increment your counter in that for loop. The algorithm's basically trapped in an infinite loop of while(userLikes === "Hunting" || userLikes === "Dragons") { recommendMore(); } without any exit condition!

The commitment to the bit is strong with this one. Some developers spend decades mastering languages and frameworks for practical career advancement. Then there's this absolute legend who spent seven years learning game development just to recreate a goose from Animal Crossing for a dad joke. This is the same energy as writing a custom sorting algorithm when you could just use Array.sort(). Or building your own JavaScript framework because React "doesn't meet your specific needs." We've all worked with that developer who takes the scenic route through hell when npm install would've done the trick. I'm not even mad. I'm impressed. This is what peak dedication looks like. Ship it.

That crushing moment when your progress bar hits 30% after you've already sacrificed three weekends and fifteen cups of coffee. The exact same feeling applies to large-scale software projects—you think you've conquered the mountain until Git informs you there are 47 more branches to merge. Enterprise Java projects are basically designed to make grown developers cry like this child. The real tragedy? That remaining 70% is where all the undocumented legacy code and unexpected requirements live.