Best of the best

Content OMG HI! YOU'RE A VERIFIED BOT DEVELOPER?! COder vandaag om 15:18 Yes vandaag om 15:18 O: CAN YOU CODE MY BOT?! it keeps breaking for no reason COder vandaag om 15:19 Eh depends What keeps breaking? FastersT-vandaag om 15:19 every single command i don't know why though COder vandaag om 15:19 What's the error? Fogies Y vandaag om 15:19 there's no error it just keeps breaking and dosen't work COder vandaag om 15:20 What language are you using? Fonter T vandaag om 15:20 English of course COder vandaag om 15:21 ah right Maybe you should check for grammar mistakes vandaag om 15:21 Nope i'm a expert at grammar but it's ok if you don't know how to fix

Content the face when you fix a bug and the whole program breaks

Content Hey, are you sleeping? I found out how to fix that bug on line 97 How can you be so sure I didn't find a solution? Yes, now shut up! No, you did not! We will google a solution tomorrow I'm your brain and I don't remember you ever fixing a bug without googling it first!

The eternal developer pilgrimage, perfectly captured! This is what happens when you just want to fix that one tiny bug, but the internet has other plans. That comically long printout represents the soul-crushing journey every programmer takes when searching for answers. You start with such hope on Stack Overflow, only to be sent through a labyrinth of outdated links, abandoned GitHub repos, and eventually to some ancient YouTube tutorial where a teenager with a terrible microphone mumbles the solution while Linkin Park plays in the background. The best part? After this entire odyssey, you'll probably just end up using a completely different approach anyway. It's like the programming equivalent of those "you had the power inside you all along" movies, except with more crying and energy drinks.

Content Programmer - Translation Guide What Progammers Say What Progammers Mean Horrible hack Horrible hack that I didn't write Temporary workaround Horrible hack that I wrote It's broken There are bugs in your code It has a few issues obscure There are bugs in my code Someone else's code doesn't have comments Self-documenting My code doesn't have comments That's why it's an awesome It's my favorite language and it's really easy to language do something in it You're thinking in the It's my favourite language and it's really hard wrong mindset to do something in it I can read this Perl script I wrote this Perl script I can't read this Perl script I didn't write this Perl script Bad structure Complex structure Someone else's code is badly organised My code is badly organised Bug Out of scope The absence of a feature I like The absence of a feature I don't like Clean solution It works and I understand it We need to rewrite it It works but I don't understand it emacs is better than vi vi is better than emacs It's too peaceful here, let's start a flame war It's too peaceful here, let's start a flame war IMHO You are wrong Legacy code It works, but no one knows how X Cquit ESCIESCTC I don't know how to quit vi Suboptimal implementation The worst errors ever inflicted on humankind That can't be done It can be done, but it's boring and I don't want to do it No problem, people do this all the time. It's an easy fix. You might be the most idiotic person I've ever encountered Put that bug in the backlog Let's agree nobody ever mentions it again and with low priority ppl who do, will be shot These test environments are too brittle Proof-of-Concept Works on my machine. Have you tried restarting it? What I wrote Perfect solution How Sales Marketing are promoting it

Content Tester who found new bugs Developer who needs to fix more buas Caa GENILDO,