Shorten Movie: The Ultimate Compression Algorithm

OH. MY. GOD. The AUDACITY of these students using a 32-bit integer for EVERYTHING! 💀 Meanwhile, that poor 8-bit char and 16-bit short are just STANDING THERE, completely IGNORED and UNEMPLOYED! The DRAMA! The WASTE of precious memory! It's like buying a mansion just to store your socks! Those memory-efficient data types are literally BEGGING to be used, but nooooo, let's just throw 32 bits at EVERYTHING because who needs optimization when you have 16GB of RAM, right?! The 1970s programmers are ROLLING in their retirement homes right now!

The stark contrast between Turing's monumental achievement and the UK government's response is the digital equivalent of getting a segmentation fault after writing perfect code. Turing literally broke the unbreakable Nazi Enigma machine, shortened WWII by years, and saved countless lives... only to be prosecuted for his sexuality in 1952. The government basically responded with the computational equivalent of a null pointer exception to his genius. Historical tech debt at its finest—they eventually issued an apology in 2009, which is like fixing a critical bug 57 years after it was reported.

When you think you've fixed that nasty bug, but instead you've unleashed an exponential nightmare. The health points just keep multiplying while you frantically swing your debugging hammer! First it's 10 HP, then suddenly 5471 HP. That's not a bug anymore—that's a full-blown boss battle with terrible scaling mechanics. Just like when you fix one null pointer exception only to discover you've created an infinite loop that's eating all your memory. The more you hit it, the stronger it gets. Classic case of accidental O(2^n) complexity when you were aiming for a simple O(1) fix.

OH. MY. GOD. The most diabolical infinite loop known to mankind! This sticky note is basically the real-world implementation of while True: print("I'll be back in 5 mins") and I am DYING! 😂 It's the recursion that never ends! That poor soul waiting for their colleague to return might as well settle in for eternity. The sheer AUDACITY of creating a physical infinite loop without a break statement should be illegal in at least 17 countries! And the worst part? There's no exception handling for human patience. Your options are either wait forever or realize you've been absolutely bamboozled by the oldest trick in the programmer's book of practical jokes.

The existential fashion crisis no data structure ever asked for! On the left, we have pants for each branch—practically a denim multiverse with every node getting its own pant leg. On the right, one massive pair that's basically a blue tarp with leg holes. This is peak computer science philosophy—we're literally debating how an abstract concept would wear clothing. Next up: should linked lists wear belts or suspenders? And do hash tables prefer bucket hats?

Someone counted the letters between 'i' and 'z' and decided that's why we can't have more than 18 nested for loops. Because clearly, the limiting factor in your code isn't the stack overflow, processor meltdown, or your will to live - it's the English alphabet. Next up: arrays can only have 26 dimensions because we ran out of variable names.