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When your girlfriend questions her position in your life, just tell her she's at index [1] in your array of interests. She'll think she's second place, but little does she know arrays start at 0, making her actually second-to-last in your priority list. Genius level relationship deception using computer science! The real question is what's at index [0]? Probably debugging that recursive function that's been keeping you up for three nights straight.

Listen, when someone questions why you use i and j for loop counters, there's only one valid response: IT'S THE LAW. It's like asking why we drink coffee or hate meetings that could've been emails. Some traditions in programming aren't meant to be questioned—they're sacred knowledge passed down from the ancient CS gods. Using foo and bar as placeholder names, tabs vs spaces, and i , j , k for nested loops... these are the unwritten commandments that separate the true believers from the heretics. Sure, you could use descriptive variable names like index or counter , but then your fellow devs might think you're some kind of revolutionary anarchist. And nobody wants that kind of reputation in the office.

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Content Is Your Child Texting About Programming Languages? What your C obsessed teen's texts actually mean omg - one more generic wtf -wheres the function fml - for my loop idfc indentation doesn't feel correct lol - logic on loop aka - abhorrent kafkaesque arithmetic rofl - right-oriented frame layout imo - iteration may overload stfu - statically typed feels unwise brb - bad recursion brb