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Content When employers want you to have 10 years of work experience before the age of 22

Look at that shower tile pattern—it's literally a GitHub contribution graph in your bathroom! Meanwhile, your own GitHub profile is emptier than a cache after clearing browser history. The shower is out here making daily contributions while you're still debugging that same for loop from last Tuesday. Guess who's getting more stars on their repos? Not you, buddy.

Content IT department congratulating me on not opening the phishing test email today Me who hasn't checked my email today

Oh, the DRAMA of modern coding! 💅 First, you beg Copilot for help like it's some coding messiah. Then you desperately turn to AI, practically on your knees, hoping it'll save your pathetic bug-ridden code. And what do you get? THE MOST INSULTING GARBAGE ANSWER EVER CONCEIVED BY DIGITAL INTELLIGENCE! 😤 It's like asking a chef for cooking tips and they suggest eating the raw chicken because "it looks done enough." Fine then! I'll just fix it myself while dramatically sighing loud enough for my neighbors to hear! The trust issues I've developed with AI assistants will require YEARS of therapy!

Behold the rare sighting of a backend developer attempting to write CSS! Nothing says "I'm out of my comfort zone" quite like physically pointing at the screen as if the styles might respond to intimidation tactics. This is the equivalent of a fish trying to climb a tree – technically possible, but painful to watch. The backend dev probably spent 3 hours just trying to center a div, only to give up and mutter something about "this is why we have frontend specialists" before crawling back to the safety of their database queries and API endpoints.

Content JAVA IN THE 90S JAVA TODAY